I Stand at the Door and Knock

I always think of this as a Gospels quote, but, no, it's from John's acid trip on Patmos:

Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.

I heard the knocking. I tried to open the door. I tugged, and pulled, and pried, and grunted and strained, but the door was jambed shut. I yelled through it: Don't go away! I'm trying to open it!

Nothing different today from the past several thousand days except the weakening of my strength to endure it.

What do the friends of Job tell him? You must not be believing the right thing. You didn't do the right rituals. You had some kind of carry-forward karma. And with each friend's ideas, Job returned with righteous refutation. He never found what was right, quite, but he knew all his friends' ideas missed the mark.

I don't know what's right. I just know how it is isn't.

*

So, don't mind me. It's been a long day, week, month, year, decade, century so far. Just needed to vent.